smoking

Main | June 2005 »

May 31, 2005

SIGWTF

Posted by j at 10:01 AM | Comments (0)

May 29, 2005

OMGWTFLIGHTHOUSE

Posted by j at 09:02 PM | Comments (0)

May 26, 2005

Why, no...

Posted by j at 08:30 PM | Comments (0)

May 21, 2005

Oops

Posted by j at 12:24 PM | Comments (0)

May 20, 2005

I believe...

I'm pretty cynical. As a person, I mean.

I tend to view things pretty negatively, at least at first, if not forever more.

Let me dispell a myth. It is not "cool", as the kids say, to be a cynic. It's not fun, and you tend to have a very bleak outlook on life in general, and difficulty believing in anything.

Well, anything except undeniable fact.

You're just itching for an example aren't you, you little faggot? I'll not disappoint.

Drakul likes to have his dick sucked by guys. Furthermore, he enjoys the packing of ass. With gusto. These things I know, and they lead me to the solid undeniable fact that Drakul is gay.

But that's not really all that cynics can believe in.

For one thing, many cynics believe in their utter devotion to their own cynicism -- a rather romantic notion if you really think about it. This is not solid undeniable fact, but rather, at least to us onlookers, something far less tangible than, say, Drakul's penchant for anal sex with men.

Far fewer, at least, that I've seen, will confess their belief in other things, especially those things less tangible, like, for instance, faith in something, lest it run counter to their all too hip impression of their own cynicism.

The trick here, is the understanding that being cynical about things cannot exclude ones self, or indeed, ones' cynicism.

Being cynical about your own cynicism allows you a suspension of reality in which you are able, if only for a moment, to have beliefs in something. Anything.

This suspension allows us to believe that things like jumping from a tall place with a bit of elastic affixed to our legs is a good idea, despite being pioneered in the antipodes by some insane fucker not known for brilliant ideas.

And it allows us to have a belief that what we're doing, in some way, matters, and that it will result in something that we can perceive to be good. That we can, aided by others, achieve something utterly unrealistic for the gain of all (where "all" consists mostly of shareholders).

But what happens when the belief ends? When we're jolted back to reality and decide that it's all really utter crap?

I look deep within myself, and cynically at my own cynicism, and enter a moment of suspended disbelief whereby I can subscribe to my personal ethics, quit my job, call someone gay, and begin the search for alternate employment.

Posted by j at 07:10 PM | Comments (0)

May 13, 2005

Well Toto...

Posted by j at 09:54 AM | Comments (0)

May 11, 2005

Fucking annoying question

Is Peter is gay?

Let's put that one aside for now. I'd like to answer one of those questions often asked of me: Why did you quit your previous job?

I quit my previous job to look for another job.

I'll probably need to elaborate here, so let's start with ethics.

I'm a good corporate citizen. Don't ask me why -- it's largely irrational, and I can't quite explain to anyone why precisely I book cheap hotels, take red-eye flights, and work sixty hour weeks. Nonetheless, I do just that. In part, I think it's ethically derelict to spend money that I personally would not otherwise spend simply because the company's paying the bill. My needs are simple, and on a business trip, they stay equally simple.

Which is not to say that I'm afraid to spend the company's money.

So, ethics.

It happens that I also would consider it ethically derelict for me to spend my time searching for a job while employed elsewhere, as many (if not all) job searching activities take place during regularly scheduled business hours.

So I quit my job, and started looking for a new one.

It's probably important to note that while I may consider it to be ethically derelict of myself, it's unlikely that I see it as being so of the vast majority of people.

Ethics are, in my opinion, a luxury afforded by those with the means. If I didn't have the fiduciary means of supporting myself out of work, I'd have looked for a new job prior to my resignation. As it happens, I have the means to afford the luxury of keeping to my own ethical code.

So, I suppose a better question would be: Why were you looking for a new job?

I'm not going to answer that now.

But I will tell you that Peter is, indeed, gay. Of course he is.

Posted by j at 02:33 PM | Comments (0)

May 06, 2005

Is it easy?

Posted by j at 03:52 PM | Comments (0)

Sustained interest

I've got a pretty short attention span for many things, and I'm pretty sure blogging will probably fall into that clearly defined category of "many things".

That's likely to lead to me forgetting, in large part, to blog things that I mean to blog, perhaps for extended periods of time. In essence, that I'll forget that I am a blogger.

That's not really new to most people -- I'm sure many people experience similar situations day to day.

Take thunder, for example.

His dedication to his sexual preference is clearly lacking. While conversing with this chap, he mentioned, to my utter shock and disbelief, that he has a girlfriend, and furthermore, that he's been with-girlfriend for about two months.

Clearly thunder has forgotten that he's gay. Perhaps had he a sustained interest in his homosexuality, he'd not have forgotten that key fact, and wouldn't have to deal with all those awkward situations that are bound to arise.

You know the ones I mean.

In some fashion, though, it's clear to me that subjects in which he does have a sustained interest, will find ways in which to manifest the interests he has perhaps a lesser ability to sustain.

Isn't that comforting to know?

I suppose that if you, reader, are willing to forgive thunder his transgressions due to his inability to have a sustained interest in certain of his pursuits, you might just be willing to forgive me when I forget to blog for long periods of time.

And if not, it doesn't really matter -- I'll just call you gay when I get back to my blog.

Posted by j at 09:15 AM | Comments (0)

May 04, 2005

Differences

I've smoked my last gauloises, so I'm back to american spirits for the time being. They're really only superficially different -- I'll die smoking either.

Let's begin with an example.

I think that a liberal attitude toward politics, limp wrists, a taste for quiche and iced coffee drinks with whipped cream served with little phallic representations reproduced in chocolate, linking me from his blog, and regular anal intercourse -- oh, I'm sorry, let me dumb that down for you -- taking it in the pooper on a daily basis, make you a homosexual.

My dear friend does not.

You may argue that I'm making a generalisation with that statement, and that not all eaters of quiche are that way inclined.

You may suggest that homosexual acts, in and of themselves, do not a flamer make. That in order to truly be labeled gay, the individual in question would have to have enjoyed such undertakings. Well, I operate the camera, and believe me, he likes it.

I've lost my place here. Let's go back to the part about him being gay.

This is a fundamental difference, as is, I suppose, your potentially disagreeable attitude toward mine.

Fear not, asinine reader. I'll allow you to retract your statements and accept my opinion as gospel, as I'm clearly correct.

It's these differences that affect our general attitude toward any endeavour we may choose to pursue, and indeed, the way we choose to live our lives.

If you may indulge me another example, and another generalisation: Consider the way life is led on opposite sides of the Atlantic ocean. Europe and America, if you will.

From the west comes turn-over based fast food restaurants, factory assembly lines, gay military analysts, and a fast paced lifestyle in which, to borrow an old phrase, life is spent attaining wealth, and wealth spent attaining youth.

From the east comes a single six-hour dinner time sitting, hand-made goods, and midday breaks in the workday -- plently of time to smell the roses, as it were.

It's these differences that make people what they are, be they striving for a goal to which a time limit is placed, or enjoying the journey for what it is and to its end. Differences which, while never really agreed upon, can be understood if time is taken to do so, and fully realised as benign.

When labeled and misunderstood, differences in living often cause conflict, and it is in the conflict that journeys are cut prematurely short, and goals left unmet.

And I think that this is what our softly worn measurer of alcohol with a predeliction toward iced coffee drinks with whipped cream served with little phallic representations reproduced in chocolate perhaps doesn't like so much.

Maybe I can agree with that.

As to the other stuff...

Posted by j at 01:39 AM | Comments (0)

That French guy is a filthy liar...

I am talking, of course, about this jerk. We don't all blog. He's just lucky he's got that sexy french accent.

Wait.

Shit.

So why start a blog? I suppose because everyone else is doing it, and I'm a sheep -- I follow the crowd. I'm just that lame.

When I think about it carefully, though, I do realise that I forget most of the things I do or encounter in my daily life. I suppose Coupland was right when he wrote that book so many years ago -- essentially that there's too many things to remember nowadays. That it's no longer fundamentally important to know things, but rather, how or where to find the information pertaining to them.

So I suppose I'm making a place to find those things that I'll forget.

Then there's all those other jerks I know. Those bastards.

Also I'm some whiny privileged prick who feels the need to unburden himself on the general population.

And yeah. I'm smoking.

Posted by j at 12:17 AM | Comments (0)